Sometimes in life the things that are the most difficult and painful are the best things for us. Mr. Handsome and I went to our house this weekend to pack. Yes, already packing up our first home. The first house we ever bought together that, although we’ve owned it for 2 years January 1st, we’ve only lived in it for 10 months. This big, beautiful house that we imagined raising a family inside. No, Mr. Handsome and I packed all our things this weekend so another family can perhaps enjoy the dreams we had for that home (and, no, we did not sell the house…I wish). For the first time, I was really sad about it. Being there reminded me of so many things: that distinct, fresh paint smell that it has; the beautiful way the morning sun makes the leaves on the trees outside catch fire in reds and oranges (all year long, it seems); the comfort of my chair and a half that begs me to take a nap in the afternoon sun…all things I love about our first house.
I’ve tried to figure it out a million times. Is it a “nesting” instinct that calls you to buy your dream house and everything in it after you get married? Just sit around, waiting for the next stage in your life (ie. babies)? I will admit to you that Mr. Handsome and I often looked at each other after being homeowners for a couple of months and agree that we were far to young to be living like this. We started to hate suburbia and everything with it. It was quiet. It was boring. It was BIG and empty. There was nothing to do close by. Everyone had kids. We had no friends that we really connected with like our friends from Kentucky. We are still soo young… Just because we were married, was this what we were supposed to do now? Was moving out-of-state a bad idea? Was buying a house a bad idea?
Hindsight is 20/20, isn’t it?
In some ways, I was right. Suburbia was too much for us right now. We just got married, we were both 23 and 24 years old and needed nothing to do with a Wisteria-lane like neighborhood and big ‘ol house. We decided long ago that we didn’t want to have kids until several years after we were married (we wanted to enjoy our 20’s as much as possible-travel and be adventurous), but heck…in that atmosphere, I have a feeling it would have come sooner than later. Probably because we would start feeling guilty about having empty bedrooms or something. You can only imagine how suburbia changed us.
Literally overnight, Mr. Handsome and I were packing (the first time) to move to Atlanta last fall. We stayed in hotels for a few days until I secured a job. For weeks Mr. Handsome was gone Monday thru Friday while he worked in Atlanta and I was completely alone in suburbia. Alone. My cell phone didn’t even work from our house. We put our house up for sale and on a prayer, we moved into a small condo in Midtown Atlanta. Right in the middle of the heart of Atlanta.
Then, our lives changed. For the first time, we felt like we were right where we’re supposed to be. We were right about one thing and that was buying our house. It was a mistake but, like I said, hindsight is 20/20. We were wrong, however, about moving outside of Kentucky. I am thankful everyday that we took that risk and made that move. Although we took a detour in Cornelius, NC, we are so happy in Atlanta and feet like we can finally enjoy our young married life. Mark and I had more fun in 2009 than any other year of our lives, EVER.
So, you can imagine, that heading back to our first home was like visiting a time capsule. It was like visiting the “old us.” The man that worked on the yard all weekend. The girl who asked for a subscription to Better Homes and Gardens and a Martha Stewart’s Housekeeping book for Valentines day. I love my lawn worker husband, but I know that he’ll also be there 5-10 years from now, when I’m actually ready to have a lawn. And I’ll keep my Martha Stewart book, right beside my Bible and my Emily Post Book of Etiquette. But I’m packing away my duster and won’t ever make homemade laundry detergent again.
If anything, we learned a few valuable lessons.
1.) Live in the moment. Don’t. Rush. LIFE.
2.) Be spontaneous. You learn more about yourself when you take (calculated) risks.
3.) Say yes to opportunities. All you have is today, make it great…say YES!!
4.) Having the right life partner is everything. The peaks and dips have been great, but having someone to roll with the punches in life is amazing.
5.) Suburbia will be waiting for us when we’re ready…